FROM THE DAWGHOUSE…
UNEQUALLY YOKED
“Dad, do I continue dating him or do I have to cut it off? I think I’m falling in love.”
What would you say if your Christ-following, Bible believing, Christian school taught raised in the church daughter sent you a text like that about a guy she’s dating who is a relatively good guy with some religious background, who’s NOT pressuring her for sex and who she’s falling for?
Ya, the tough stuff of fatherhood.
Fortunately, there is something Paul says that directly applies here and to which a dad can turn. Here it is…
2 Corinthians 6:14-18
14 Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 15 What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? 16 What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said,
“I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them,
and I will be their God,
and they shall be my people.
17 Therefore go out from their midst,
and be separate from them, says the Lord,
and touch no unclean thing;
then I will welcome you,
18 and I will be a father to you,
and you shall be sons and daughters to me,
says the Lord Almighty.”
Chew on that for awhile like a starving lion chewing on a bone. What does the Spirit of God say to you? Write down some brief thoughts that you could say to your daughter.
Ok now my turn:
- Over time I’ve learned that if I try to out-think or out-flank God’s clear teaching I end up digging a pit I fall into. This guidance for our lives as Christians is clear and applies to marriage and forming close business relationships with non-believers. It’s never a good idea. Don’t over think this. You can’t out-think God.
- We need to teach our daughters while they are very young that they need to limit their scope of marriageable partners to men who are committed Christians.
- We need to start praying for our daughter’s spouse when they are very, very young. Uh, right after they are born is a good time to start.
- We need to develop our boys to become, as one mother said, godly, employable and marriageable. Our ministry to men and fathers in FORGE has to think generationally…way down the pike.
- Every time I’ve ever heard of a woman who married a man because she was going “to make him better” and “turn him into a Christian”, it hasn’t happened. In 66 years I’ve never heard of it working out. I’ve never read of it working out. I know of several circumstances where it definitely did NOT work out.
So it happens. Our Christian daughter starts falling for a non-Christian guy. She has to make a choice doesn’t she? And we can help. We can point her to God’s truth. This passage above. We can listen to her heart and let her pour out her emotions. We can hug her. We can ask her to trust that God is good, all the time, and has a great plan for her, if she will take Him at His word. We can also say that if she goes her way and ignores God, God will still love her but let her experience the consequences of her decision. We can pray, and fast for her to make the right decision. We can’t control her decision. We won’t walk away from her. We get friends to storm the gates of heaven about this. This is what brothers are for!
We will pray for the miracle of faith, her faith in Christ, to trump human emotions.
This will yank your heart into so many directions you’ll feel like silly putty at a kids birthday party. Like you’re the donkey they’re pinning tails on. But you’re a dad. A Christ-following dad.
So you do the right thing for your daughter and lead her to Jesus.
Lead like a man who loves too much to lead them astray.
Strength and Courage,
Pete Alwinson
